The secrets of the female orgasm and the truth about simulation, two points that men have been wondering about for centuries. And just to let you in on the secret today, unfaithful women have more orgasms with their lover than with their partner. And they know why. And now, so do you.

In the complex world of human sexuality, female orgasm has always been shrouded in mystery and misunderstanding. Yet there are some surprising facts we need to explore, especially among unfaithful women. As you’ll know by now if you read my articles, the post-holiday period, and especially the beginning of mid-January, is the best time for infidelity.

Let’s delve into the hidden reality of the female orgasm, based on recent studies and surveys. Please don’t think I’m basing this article on my feelings. No, let’s talk truth and facts. We’ll also look at the issue of simulation and its motivations. Get ready to discover the secrets of female pleasure.

Unfaithful women and orgasm: the importance of foreplay

13% of women who cheat reach 7th heaven every time with their partner, 52% with their lover. Why would this be? The main reason is the importance attached to foreplay. As a result of this lack (or “miss”), 50% of women fake orgasm regularly, 11% every coitus*. Among those who pretend to moan, 87% seek to flatter their partner’s ego, 66% to simply shorten intercourse**. All of which calls into question certain “performances” on the part of these gentlemen. And yet, even if these figures may surprise you, there are good reasons for all this. And it all starts with a lack of communication between the two, leading to misunderstandings about expectations.

Male vs.female orgasm: the “orgasm gap”

One reason for this misunderstanding is the “orgasm gap” between the sexes. According to a Durex survey reported by The Guardian, men orgasm 4 times more often than women during heterosexual intercourse. Why is this? According to sex therapist Silva Neves, interviewed by the British newspaper, men tend to “equate sex with penetration”, with “the clitoris not quite in the right place to climax”.

Foreplay, the key to extra-marital pleasure

According to a Gleeden survey of 3,000 women in extramarital relationships***, the sex therapist has a pretty accurate view of things, especially when you consider that only 13% systematically reach orgasm with their official partner, compared with 52% with their lover.

The importance of foreplay seems to play an essential role in the experience of pleasure within extramarital relationships. More than half the women surveyed (54%) believe that special attention to foreplay is fundamental to their sexual fulfillment. This foreplay, whether involving oral or digital caresses, seems to open up wider horizons for intimate satisfaction. What’s more, for 63% of participants, the mere anticipation of these moments already contributes to making them more aroused.

“It’s quite funny to realize that almost all women have simulated an orgasm in their lifetime, while [most] men believe it’s never happened with them,” remarks Solène Paillet, Gleeden’s Communications Director. ” This demonstrates a real problem of communication within the couple, and it’s often this lack of fundamental exchange that can subsequently lead to infidelity “.

Free expression and theability toact without restraint at the heart of ecstasy

Meanwhile, 36% of women say they can more easily tell their lover what they really like – or don’t like – without fear of offending. Half also believe that if they find it easier to reach orgasm with their lover, it’s because they can “really let loose” with him or her.

*Figures taken from a Gleeden survey conducted on the occasion of World Orgasm Day 2021, among 5,200 French, Belgian and Swiss members. ** Based on a study by the University of Central Lancashire and Leeds. *** Survey of 3,132 women registered on Gleeden in France, Belgium and Switzerland who declared having an extramarital relationship at the time of the survey, August 2023.

Orgasm simulation: acommon phenomenon

Statistics reveal that orgasm simulation is more common than you might think. A survey by Gleeden* reveals that 47% of women regularly fake orgasm, and 11% do so every time they have sex. However, 81% of men believe that their partner has never faked an orgasm with them, indicating a lack of communication within the couple.

The motivationsbehind simulation

Women’s reasons for simulating orgasm are varied. Most do it to flatter their partner’s ego (61%) or to avoid offending him (more than half). Sadly, some women (56%) exaggerate their pleasure to shorten intercourse.

Men simulate too, but not for thesame reasons

Some men also fake orgasm*, although their numbers are significantly lower than women’s, with only 29% having ever adopted this stratagem. However, when they do fake orgasm, their motivation differs considerably from that of women. Indeed, 71% of them do so with the aim of increasing overall arousal during the act.

*Survey conducted by extra-marital dating site Gleeden among 5,2000 of its French, Belgian and Swiss members.

The truth about moaning

In 2019, a survey conducted by Ifop for Online Seduction proved that 67% of women under the age of 30 were faking an orgasm during intercourse. Three years later, a new study confirms that this figure has not improved. This time, British researchers looked at the reasons why women express themselves during intercourse.

A recent study carried out by the University of Central Lancashire and Leeds on 71 women aged between 18 and 48, reveals that 87% of women moan during lovemaking to please their partner and make him or her feel good. This strategy is even considered effective by 92% of the women surveyed.

However, the motivation behind moaning is not always pleasure. In 66% of cases, women use this technique to speed up or shorten a lovemaking session because of boredom, fatigue, discomfort or even pain.

Last word

Female orgasm remains a complex subject, and orgasm simulation is a reality that deserves to be openly discussed within couples. Understanding the motivations behind this practice can improve communication and intimacy between partners. Ultimately, the quest for genuine, shared pleasure should be at the heart of every intimate relationship

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